Alessandra Risotti's Assignment (2)

Take a picture of a birthday cake

Assignment #62

Make an educational public plaque.

In Paris when the metric system was being introduced the government installed meter plaques on various buildings around the city. These plaques were just simple metal signs that indicated the length of a meter so that the public would become familiar with it as a way to measure things. People would actually use the plaques to measure out pieces of fabric etc.

For this assignment come up with some simple but useful information that can be made into a plaque or sign and then install it in some public place for people to learn from and use. We encourage you to make your plaque in a permanent material and bolt it or use a strong adhesive when you attach the plaque. Note: do not bother making a plaque that is witty. Think of information that you routinely wish you had, and provide it to the public.

*El estadío del espejo como formador de la función del yo (je) tal como se nos revela en la experiencia psicoanalítica (J.Lacan)* 

Baño de mujeres en Facultad de Humanidades. 

Útil.

OMFG.

Peter Max Lawrence's Assignment

"Produce Sticker"

How to PRODUCE STICKER

1. Find an unused decorative object in the kitchen(one you already have, can make or find on the street).

2. Start by taking the stickers off of your supermarket produce purchases and placing them on the object.

3. Ask your fellow dwellers to participate and enjoy the slow growth creation.

4. Spend several months to a year(or go forever) repeating this action.

5. Photograph the object finished or in progress.

6. Congratulate your self for eating fresh PRODUCE.

Assignment #40

Heal yourself.

Describe in writing a non-traditional method you have used to heal yourself. Include diagrams, photographs, or drawings as needed.

"Cómo sobrevivir con dignidad un domingo de noviembre prefinales cuando no se ha estudiado para el primero, que es Psicopato II, y es evidente que cualquier plan para febrero se ve seriamente comprometido en razón de haber desperdiciado una semana entera de estudio"

1. Despertarse relativamente tarde.

2. Mirar el diario de reojo.

3. Mirar la revista del domingo de reojo.

4. No mirar las minas en bikinis y pensar "es obvio que ninguno me entra".

5. Buscar a chica favorita.

6. Ir al supermercado y comprar: pollo, baguettes, tomates cherry, palta, mangos, jugo de naranja, jugo de pomelo, frutillas, moras, bananas, duraznos en almíbar, ETC. ETC. ETC.

7. Preparar sandwiches á la Lola (pollo, hummus, tomate, baguette de cebolla, pimienta) y á la Zoe (pollo, palta, tomate, baguette común, secret ingredient).

8. Preparar licuados varios: mago mix (mango, pomelo, duraznos) y de la casa (naranja, banana, frutillas).

9. Poner The Magnetic Fields.

10. Comer.

11. Beber hasta la última gota.

12. Preparar chocolate chip cookies para el té.

13. Comerlas jugando al Mario 2.

Assignment #55
Photograph a significant outfit.

Lo que me puse cuando rendí el final de Psicopatología.

Remember exactly what you were wearing during a recent significant moment. Maybe it was the day that your boyfriend broke up with you, or the day your nephew was born, or the day you decided to become a vegetarian. It should be something that happened in the last six months. Lay out what you were wearing on the floor, as if you are dressing an invisible, flat person. Tuck the shirt in to the pants, the socks in to the shoes, etc. Don't forget the other things that complete your outfit such as jewelry, purse, hat, etc. Do not add anything extra, like a wig or a mask - just the clothes you were wearing. Stand on a chair or table and photograph the clothes from directly above. Not from above at a slight angle, but so that the camera is pointing straight down. Post the photo, along with the importance of the day, for example, "What I Was Wearing When I Got The Phone Call About Grandma Marris Dying." Please try and keep your title/description as short as possible. Do not write on the actual photograph, and make sure your photo is in focus. Note: avoid moments that you knew would be significant and so dressed accordingly - such as graduation or Halloween. The outfit itself does not need to be significant, it is just what you happened to be wearing when something of emotional significance happened.

Assignment #15
Hang a windchime on a tree in a parking lot.

Martinez, Provincia de Buenos Aires, Argentina.

Make or buy or find a windchime. Hang the windchime on a tree branch in a median strip at a largish shopping center parking lot. Leave the windchime there.

OH, OH!

Assignment #37
Write down a recent argument.

The next time you have an argument, write down what you and the other person said to each other. 

Write this in a script form, like:    

Me: You said you would do the dishes if I made dinner. Henry: What? I'm going to do them. I just don't want to do them immediately. Some people like to digest first.    

etc    

Try to be really accurate, capturing the real words that were used. If there was important movement this can be included in parentheses: (Henry turns on the tv.) 

The argument need not be long or dramatic, it can be brief and seemingly petty. The most important thing is that it be an accurate record of the exchange. 

- Quiero comer... ¿cómo se llama lo que tengo ganas de comer? 

- Ahora me queda más cómodo bajar por Corrientes.

- CURRY. 

- Gazcón y...

- Gazcón, Gazcón... ¡Nazca y Gaona!

- ...

- Necesito curry.

- Si querés hoy te preparo el pollo ese con la receta que me dijo Nico.

- ¡Sí!

- ¿Tenemos curry?

- El que le robaste a tu ex inquilina.

- Qué bien que estuve.

- Pero no hay pechugas.

- Vamos a Disco.

- DALE.

- Pero mirá que la receta tiene crema.

- A mí me GUSTA la crema.

- Ok.

- ¿Y si mejor vamos al japonés y pedimos takeout?

- Pero es más caro.

- Hmmm... ¿sí? Pero es más rico.

- Ok entonces no te lo hago.

-¡Quiero que me lo hagas!

- ¡Es domingo a la noche y te ofrezco hacerte un pollo al curry y me lo despreciás!

- ¿Cocinar un domingo a la noche? ¿Te pensás que no hice cosas más gloriosas por vos?

- ...

- Aparte era un chiste. ¡Re quiero tu pollo al curry!

- ¡Miren el porongo ese!

- ¿Me escuchás? Era un chiste.

- ¿Era un chiste que querías hacer takeout?

- ¡Sí!

- Ok.

- Encima era eso, el chiste era que era... ¿Por qué no entendés mis chistes? 

- ¡Miren el porongo, miren!

- ¿Me escuchás? ¿Entendés?

- ¡¿Lo ven?!

- Ok. ATENTOS TODOS. ¡Atentos! Aparentemente... Ok, ¡firmes! ¡Mirar porongo, hablar de porongo, MARCH!

- Ok, ya está...

- Tiene esculturas.

- Nunca lo había visto, ¿vos?

- No... encima ayer vi una película de esculturas. Camille Claudel.

- ¿Quién era?

- Una escultura recopada, que un momento fue la novia de Rodin.

- Ok, vamos a Disco.

- Sí. Pero ¿POR QUÉ decís eso, que no me gusta la crema? ¡Si a mí la crema me RE gusta!

Assignment #60
Write a press release about an everyday event.

Write up a very official press release for something that you encounter on an everyday basis and send it to at least three news publications. The publication can be local, national or international. It doesn't matter if they report on your press release. The event that you are writing about can be anything as long as it is real, no fictional or ironic press releases. The subjects could be anything from writing about a dog that you see everyday in a neighbors yard, to the activities you see at a neighborhood basketball court.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

ACCLAIMED BLOGGER BOYFRIEND OFFERS TO COOK ON SUNDAY EVENING

(August 2nd, 2009, Buenos Aires, Argentina) 

Acclaimed blogger Rollo Tomasi offered to cook a new chicken-curry recipe for his girlfriend, Lola, during the car ride home from his parents’ this afternoon. 

“She had been whining about craving curry for a couple of days now, so I figured she'd stop if I offered,” Rollo declared, “but when she suggested she'd rather pick up take-out from a Japanese restaurant, I almost took it back.” 

Rollo had dined with his friend Nico earlier this week, an encounter in which a chicken-curry recipe was allegedly discussed.

After a brief visit to the supermarket for the required goods, Rollo retired to his study to spend some time working, while Lola lazily stretched herself in the living room sofa. “I made the worst joke at the worst possible moment, that's all. Leos are terribly proud,” she explained. 

At 7:41 pm, the groceries were still lying over the kitchen stove and Rollo had not yet started cooking, but that was fine: “I think he'll do it, though. I mean we usually eat pretty late, anyway,” Lola said. “I guess I'd better cook something for Zoe nevertheless. She's got to go to bed early today”. 

Zoe is Lola’s eight year-old daughter, who is going back to school early tomorrow, after a totally undeserved four-week break.

(Sent to: Associated Press, The New York Times, The Washington Post.)

Assignment #56
Make a portrait of your friend's desires.

A portrait of Georgie's desires

Ask a friend or relative if there is a catalogue that they want things from. Maybe it is J. Crew or Facets Multimedia or Toys R US. Get a copy of this catalogue if your friend doesn't have one. Then ask your friend to look through the catalogue and point to everything they really, really want. Not just want, but really, really want. Put a mark next to each of these things. Maybe there will only be two or three. Maybe there will be many. When they are done, carefully cut out each of these things, cut out the objects only, do not include anything surrounding them.Glue them on to a piece of colored paper.

Assignment #43
Make an exhibition of the art in your parent's house.

This will be an online exhibition, existing as a slide-show on the site. Take pictures of your parents art. This is the art you grew up with -- that picture that has always hung above the toilet, the abstract print that confused you as a child, the statuette of an angel -- art so familiar that you might not even think of it as art. But it is! And it shaped your vision of reality. Your photos should include a little bit of the surrounding area, a bit of the wall or table the art is on. Include one-sentence descriptions of how you viewed this as a child.

Assignment #63
Make an encouraging banner.

Think of something encouraging you often tell yourself. For example:Everything will be ok. Or: Don't listen to them. Or: It'll blow over. Now make a banner, making sure to follow these instructions:

  
1. Draw each letter of the sentence on a large piece of colored construction paper or big squares of fabric. One letter per piece.Draw them blocky so you can cut them out.
2. Cut them out.
3. Glue each one onto a piece of construction paper or fabric that is a contrasting color.
4. Then glue the edges of all the pieces of paper or fabric together to make a banner.
5. Hang the banner in a place where you or someone else might need some encouragement, for example, across your bathroom. Or between two trees so that you and your neighbors can receive encouragement from it. Or in a gas station.

Assignment #53
Give advice to yourself in the past.

Choose a particular age you have been, perhaps a time when you were particularly lost. Write out a list of practical advice to yourself at that age. Begin the list with this header: "Advice To Michelle Cambell at Sixteen" (only use your name and whatever age you want.) You must specify the age that you are giving yourself advice to!! Be very specific with your advice, for example, don't just say "Hold on to your heart," but instead say "Don't go out with Kevin, he will eventually cheat on you. Go out with Jake instead, he is actually cooler." If you need to use fake names go ahead. It is easy to say that everything happens for a reason, but take this opportunity to redirect yourself towards what you think might have been better. Sure everything turned out ok, but maybe you should have quit that job five years earlier, maybe you should have had children when you were 27, maybe you should have flossed, maybe you should have gone to the alternative high school, or not said that thing to your best friend. Tell yourself what to do in clear, specific language. Do not write an essay, make it in list form.

Advice to Inés at age fourteen

- No te preocupes por la loca esa. No te quiere, no te limes, no vale la pena. 

- Respecto de esto, por ejemplo: hacele caso a tu vecino de enfrente. Y andá con él a la fiesta de 15 de la infradotada esa, qué te chupa. 

- No te preocupes por el cambio de colegio. A los seis meses conocés a todas. Dales bola, son tus futuras amigas, tus amigas posta, tus *amigas*. Abrí los ojos y bajá diez cambios.

- Ah pero respecto del uniforme: los mocasines de Guido's son lo máximo y te banco a muerte, pero ojo que patinan. Y no necesitás una pollera ASÍ de corta. 

- A la gorda de historia no le va a gustar que sepas todo y le interrumpas la clase, hacete la boluda.

- Es verdad que la vieja de geografía no te banca, y es verdad cuando te dice, la segunda clase, que te va a mandar a diciembre. Forget about it, no te angusties, y por sobre todas las cosas: pasale la goma a Walker con delicadeza. O no llores después si la vieja puta te pone amonestaciones. 

- NO LA TRATES MAL A GEORGIE. 

- Respecto de esa OTRA fiesta de 15, ponerse en pedo re da, tenés razón, pero no es necesario hacerlo a ese nivel. 

- No le "robes" ese pibe a Mengana, ni te gusta. 

- Andá al ginecólogo y empezá a tomar pastillas de una puta vez.

- NO SOS demasiado vieja para comprarte un "Fender jazz bass" y armarte una bandita punk.

- El hermano de Fulana re gusta de vos, sabelo. 

- No te rapes la mitad de la cabeza. Al menos no te tiñas el pelo que te va creciendo. Al menos no de verde.

- Comprate, armate, conseguite un vibrador. Ya.

- El año que viene, después del acto de fin de año, ANDÁ a la cita con el Bywater y que te dé esos textos que te dijo, y lo que sea quiera darte. 

- El retardado ese te puso los tracks de la skate al revés. 

- Ni te gastes, es gay. 

- Relajate que el año que viene la rulea. MAL. 

Assignment #39
Take a picture of your parents kissing.

Beit & Eddie

Take a picture of your parents kissing (or at least hugging). Do not use an older picture of your parents, we are looking for a new picture taken specifically for this assignment.

Assignment #51
Describe what to do with your body when you die.

Here is your chance to think about and describe what you would like done with your body after you die. Do you want to be buried in a cemetery, cremated and scattered in the ocean, composted beneath an apple tree? If you don't make some decisions now, someone else will make them for you later. Feel free to be creative but try to make sure that what you describe for your final remains will be legal and really possible (not fantasy), so that your friends and family can actually carry out your wishes when the time comes. If there is a particular ceremony or activity that you would like to have accompany your final Good Bye, describe that too.

Esto es lo que le dije a mi hija que hiciera con mi cuerpo muerto, hace aproximadamente una semana:

1. Quemame-cremame.

2. Meteme en una lata de Nesquick.

3. Llevame al cementerio ese cerca del Valle de la Luna al que fuimos una vez.

4. Enterrame ahí, pero no le digas a nadie así no te tratan de cobrar.

5. Hacete un picnic o algo y acordate de que era re copada y blablabla. 

Assignment #27
Take a picture of the sun.



Take a picture of the sun. Just a picture of the sun, nothing extra or fancy.

Assignment #35
Ask your family to describe what you do.

Ask three family members to write a down a description of what it is they think you do with your time. Ask them to try to think about how you live your life and what are your main activities and interests. They could give a particular example of something you are doing, for example "at the moment Susie is building a car, and it is taking up most of her evenings and weekends....," but they should not focus on examples of things you have done in the past. Also you are not asking them to say what they think of what you are doing, but only to describe it in as much detail as they know. Don't let the members of your family compare notes (until the assignment is complete) and similarly try not to put words into their mouth or tell them what they should write. This can be of any length.

Mi hermano Coqui (24 años)

Inés está estudiando la carrera de psicología así que durante la
semana o está en clase o está estudiando para algún examen. Se
despierta temprano y desayuna con su hija Zoe y su novio Lucas y su
perro Richard Parker, con quienes pasa la mayor parte de su tiempo
libre, es decir temprano a la mañana o entrando la noche. Cuando no
está estudiando pasa mucho tiempo leyendo literatura, principalmente
en inglés, y todos los días disfruta escribiendo un poco y sacando
fotos de las cosas que le gustan de su vida. Los viernes a la noche
organiza para salir a comer afuera o tomar unos tragos con su novio o
con sus amigas, y sábado por medio arreglan para visitar familia.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mi madre afín, B. (46 años)

 

Creo que tu principal provecho del tiempo libre es LEER.   Sos una devoradora de libros, una readaholic (o como se diga).

Siempre estás programándote actividades. No creo que haya un sólo fin de semana que te falten pilas para hacer una salida. O la familia o los amigos, siempre tenés un plan.

Amás estar al aire libre y el contacto con el pasto, la tierra .... la naturaleza.

También lo ocupas con innovaciones, creaciones, no sé como decirlo. De repente, sas video, sas foto, sas ... muuuuuy creativa.

Navegas muuuuuuucho por internet para investigar y aprender.

Mucho de tu tiempo libre se lo dedicás a Zoe, y una manualidad por aquí o un regalito por allá. También la hacés estudiar.

Te encanta pasear en auto.

Y esto, como no sé para qué es, no sé si lo puedo decir ... en tu tiempo libre también te gusta tomarte un JW Green Label.

Espero haber cumplido.

Muuua.

Me olvidé de algo importantísimo!

ESCRIBÍS!!!!

ahh y también charlás internéticamente.

Beso.

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Mi baby Zoe (8 años)

Mamá estudia en la compu, se cansa y descansa.
Ya no va a la facultad por un mes!!
Se queda en casa y algunas veces hace programas (NO programas tipo ir a pasear al shopping. No, va a tomar un cafecito o sale a tomar aire.)
Lee mucho igual que yo.
Para no aburrirse se plancha el pelo (algunas veces).
Mira sus mails y...
ME SALUDA CUANDO LLEGO DEL COLE!!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Assignment #33
Braid someone's hair.



Offer to braid someone's hair--could be a friend, relative or stranger.

Assignment #50
Take a flash photo under your bed.

Don't vacuum or alter anything under your bed beforehand. Take a photo under there with a strong flash, preferably with the camera sitting on the ground.

Assignment #45
Reread your favorite book from fifth grade.

Find a copy of your favorite book from when you were in the fifth grade. If you can't locate the original copy try to find one that is from the same era. Reread the book. Scan or take a picture of the cover.

Assignment #11
Photograph a scar and write about it.

Photograph a scar on your body or on someone else's body. Make it a close-up shot so that it shows just the scar. Include a story (write it on a computer as a separate file, don't write it on the photograph) about how the scar happened.

The scar happened like this:
Yo iba a parir. Marta me iba a poner el suerito.
Odio los sueritos, y la primera vez lo puso mal. Siempre, de siempre siempre, pasa lo mismo. La segunda vez lo puso bien.
Tengo pocas cicatrices en mi cuerpo.
Cuando me sacaron el suerito que servía, responsable de una de las dos cicatrices, 29 o 30 de diciembre de 2000, me fui del sanatorio a mi casa con my baby girl.

Assignment #18
Recreate a poster you had as a teenager

Remember a poster you had on your wall as a teenager. If necessary, do a little research to help you remember exactly what it looked like. Then recreate it using colored pencils or pens or paint on white paper. Scale it down to make it fit on a regular piece of paper. Next, locate a piece of music that you would have listened to at the time when you had this poster. If you are currently a teenager, just use a poster and piece of music that you have right now.

Assignment #42
List five events from 1984.

List five important things in your 1984. These are things that had a major impact on you during the year 1984. They can be personal, political, cultural, animal or whatever. Each important event should be summarized in one sentence.

En 1984

1. Tenía tres años, nació mi hermano. Me enteré en el Italpark. No me gustó.
2. Empecé a transitar mi fase genital infantil.
3. En la sala azul del jardín de infantes sonó el timbre el último día de clases y me dí cuenta de que jamás volvería a ver a Julián, el chico de preescolar que me gustaba. Me lo imaginé bajando por la escalera con una campera gris (mi papá tenía una campera gris). No lo volví a ver.
4. No leí a Orwell.
5. Me regalaron una tortuga para Navidad. Mi tía insistía con que le pusiera su nombre, mi madre quería que le pusiera ¨Manuelita¨. Yo no entendía la necesidad y les mentía; sabía que una tortuga no tenía nombre. Se me perdió al mes, en Tres Arroyos. Una de mis tías dijo que se había ido caminando para casarse con un tortugo y tener una familia. Mi madre dijo que posiblemente la agarrara uno de los perros que había en el campo y se la comiera.

Assignment #8
Curate an artist's retrospective in a public place.

Select an an artist whose work you really like and make black & white Xerox copies of their work from books and magazines. Find a public place, a bulletin board, a fence, or a wall, and post the xerox retrospective. Write a curatorial statement describing the artist and your feelings about the work and post that with the exhibition.

Plaza San Martín, C.A.B.A., Argentina.

NO TE PUEDO CREER.

Assignment #10
Make a flier of your day.

        

Write a paragraph describing a typical day in your life. Make one hundred Xerox fliers of the description (you don't have to include your name) and post them all over your neighborhood.

   

Retiro, C.A.B.A., Argentina.


NO ME DIGAS QUE HAY MÁS.